- Do wear your school uniform; it makes it easier later on.
- Avoid looking teachers or parents in the eye; as soon as they enter school, they are NOT themselves.
- If you see your friends wearing ‘outside clothes’, run.
- The bathroom is where you are safe. If you find more hints on the stalls written by past students (*don’t actually write on the bathroom stalls*), trust them; they are brave survivors that have made it from the past… Just don’t spend too much time in there or else it will seem suspicious.
- You will also find your real friends there, so stick together!
- Go back to your parents. Refer to rule 4: Don’t act suspicious.
- If you have found your friends, introduce them to your parents- remember to only speak the positives; you don’t want your parents telling you that you should leave them. This is the only time you can look your parents in the eye. Notice how tired they look and refrain from telling jokes. You must avoid being happy around them on parents evenings… just in case.
- You might have to separate from your friends because they have to remain with their parents. Tell them a secret and hug them goodbye; this might be the last time you’ll see them. Make sure your parents can see you at all times. The last thing you want is to anger them (further).
- Go on a walk with your parents to see other teachers. They might be speaking with a student. Do not interrupt them. Wait.
- Lucky for you, if you did not interrupt, the teacher will most likely be kind.
- Finish going to the rest of the teachers. They won’t say anything unexpected anyway (hopefully), so stay quiet and smile politely. And remember rule 2. If you must, do it from the side of your eye.
- Finally, it’s over. Go to the gates and walk off. You’re free.
- Your parents will remember nothing of it if you don’t speak about it.
Note: please don’t actually do any of these, this is meant to be a joke.
